So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
