You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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