I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
