Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
