There was a lot of him and a little penis
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
