Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
