are you still at the devil's house?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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