HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
