my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Of course I have a pirate flag
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
