I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
