I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
