Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
