her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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