he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Randomize
