just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
