Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
