so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
