Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
