Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
