God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Randomize
