Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
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