I want to walk on stilts...naked
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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