She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
