i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
