I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
