so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
