:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
