who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
