I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Randomize
