come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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