I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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