new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
