i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
