Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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