I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize