I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
