I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
