I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
