I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
