I'm jealous of your bromance
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Who put my cat in the fridge?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
