I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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