We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
