I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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