im gay
i know
yea but for you.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
