You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
