They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
