When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
it's like iHOP with fire
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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