It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize