Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry sunshinerays hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(908): View more from New Jersey

It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers

Fav 15 25466 1419
share tweet
(276): View more from Virginia

Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck

Fav 72 4521 1131
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(515): View more from Iowa

we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records

Fav 23 4936 873
share tweet
(907): View more from Alaska

Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.

Fav 10 1410 723
share tweet
(586): View more from Michigan

There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.

Fav 6 648 1104
share tweet
(715): View more from Wisconsin

At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.

Fav 3 588 945
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(402): View more from Nebraska

Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...

Fav 2 992 526
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(843): View more from South Carolina

Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.

Fav 1 57 24
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(920): View more from Wisconsin

Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?

Fav 0 8 39
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT