So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
